Not Alone | Where The Boys Are, A Memory - Keeping Revolution

Hello Again. 

It seems as though our excitement to be here extends to you as well. Thank you for your support and encouragement but most of all for your shares.  The weeks after initially sharing our project have been heartwarming. Seeing your boys, your stories, your memories in our Flickr group and under the hashtag #wheretheboysareproject has been amazing. It turns out that we are not alone.

We are all women raising men telling our stories in pictures and words. 

Welcome to the first installment of our August collaborative share where we invite Liz LaBianca to join us in telling our story. We hope that sharing our story inspires you to share yours. 

Here we go......

“Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn't do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.” Mark Twain - Jen Lucas 

In so many ways you are the 'easy' one.  Yet I feel cheated.  The plan was that you'd be home with me most days and once Jack was in kindergarten, we'd have 'our time'.  Just like he and I had before there was you.  But then there were challenges and evaluations, and therapies and meetings.  There was talk of a diagnosis and not a delay.  There were tears and denial (mine).   There was a conflict between what my heart wanted and what my mind knew but the 'plan' changed because you needed an IEP, more than time with me.  And at the risk of sounding ungrateful, for all the progress you've made and the incredible team on your side - I still mourn the days we should have had.  

Summer school ends an hour early and as indulgent as it may sound or appear, we've developed a daily tradition of going for 'ice-cream' straight after.  For me it's like stealing back time, the time in-between - before we get Jack / before the year begins again.  Most days it's all we have as just us.  There are times we have friends, or a playdate that meets us - but it's still about you, and I get to be there.  And that makes me happy. - Amy Bernard

He is my joy.  As he grows and embraces his independence, I find myself watching him from the shadows - because in the end - he is my light. He is my boy. - Liz LaBianca

I need to make an effort to spend alone time with each boy.  He asked for it, so it became a priority.  He chose the restaurant because it was “classy”: the food was fast, good, and there are “no dead fish on the walls. - Erika Ray

You are so aware of my camera it is very hard to get a shot of you....I watched you sitting on the skateboard ramp thinking..I was watching you wondering what was going through your head...your little mind seems so far away sometimes, I worry where it takes you..then you spotted me...!! - Sarah Roberts

My mom is a very squeamish person. So my siblings and I ended up very squeamish too. My poor brother still freaks out at the sight of a lizard. He’d hate this photo.

When I first found out I was having a boy, I made a decision that I was not going to be one of those women who freak out at the sight of a bug, snake, or mouse. I was going to show my kids that women are as brave as men. Fifteen years and three kids later, I’m glad I stuck to that decision. My kids have raised rats, gerbils, caterpillars, frogs, snakes, and lizards (alas, no regular dogs or cats, although we did have chickens at one point…) and they ‘ve enjoyed every bit of it. To tell the truth, so have I. - Linda Barber

You love it when your big brother is home with you. It is when you are your happiest. Well to be fair, his being there with you is when you are most alive. In the minutes prior to this particular moment, there was a battle of making bubbles and taking turns. And then you were just together for me like this, just happy and smiling. This is your camera smile. I don't usually go for the camera smiles. But I am so overjoyed having this moment laid down, to remember. In a few weeks that smile will likely change. Oh me, in a few weeks a lot will change. You will be off to school with your big brother, to start kindergarten. Watch out world. - Cate Wnek

You ran down the steep hill and fearlessly dove head first into the sand.  You are my adventurous guy, always ready to jump in and live life to the fullest.  After landing in the sand, you paused for a few moments to take in the view of the ocean, sand and the seals sunning themselves farther away before popping back up and heading to your next activity.  I hope you never lose that balance of action and observation. - Heather Reagan

He is now seven. SEVEN. Seven seemed old when his big brothers achieved it, but I look at him and still see so much little. It’s all in the perspective, I suppose. - Lisa Truesdell

No matter what it is, you always try your best. It may end in tears or in a huge big high five but you try with determination and pure focus. It’s one of my favourite things about you. - Anna Bein

Normally, you are hitting life head on with a smile and intensity that oozes from every fiber of your being.  Not many people see this quiet side, or know the battles you fight against your own body that cause you to retreat to this state.  So much about this scene speaks of you - always wearing a hat of some sort, mismatched clothes, dirty feet, Crocs, and the back pack that you insist on stuffing full of things every time we leave the house.  I love that you are happily, confidently free to be who God created you to be. - Abbi Ottman

You love sport and being active.  You constantly want to be outdoors, whatever the weather and will grab whatever footwear is closest (today, it was wellies), and run out in your undies in your desperation to be outside.  You’ve recently learnt to bounce your football as though it were a basketball, and Daddy even taught you the ‘under the leg’ trick. You have been practicing non-stop ever since!  Your perfectionist streak won’t let you stop until you have it perfected. - Amy Lancaster